"I need help.” Those were the first words I uttered to famed sports psychologist Dr. Stuart Singer. You might have seen his ESPN...

BREAKING NEWS: In 1895 Hamline College . . . “Uh, Dave. Isn’t there something about 1895 that’s inconsistent with “BREAKING NEWS?” I’m...

Rectal anesthesia. What? You didn’t expect this to start with rectal anesthesia? See there’s a rule of humor writing that says never miss...

"Daddy, you should vote for the M&M guy for President." Welcome to the mind of a little girl. As an occasionally decent dad, I decided to...

Not another one of those. I can’t take it. Uh, Dave? Ok, allow me to explain. As editor-in-chief of College Basketball Times, I’m forced...

A few months ago, my wife found me keeled over writhing in pain. Anticipating sympathy, instead I got, “Are you now going to do this...

While lying motionless on my basement floor, I felt my wife’s shoe nudging me, not so softly. After lifting a pillow off my face, she...

Warning: This isn't your ordinary "How to" piece. Those have something helpful - answers. But I honestly don’t know what constitutes...