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College Hoops Updates - in Jokes - by Dave Barend
5/29/2026 The NCAA announced a potential “age based eligibility” model. The Big10 isn’t sure what’s meant by “age-based”. Whereas the SEC isn’t sure what’s meant by eligibility. 5/25/2026 Georgia’s basketball team just received a donation of $10 million. Wow. Now all Georgia has to do is get donations for its other 4 starters. 5/22/2026 LSU just signed a player who is not eligible. And if you are wondering how that is possible, then you are forgetting that the school is LSU.


Domination Rankings Of Everything
DOMINATION RANKINGS OF EVERYTHING If you'd like to be one of our voters, just click here: VOTE Uh, Dave, what are we voting for. Well, we decided to expand the Domination Rankings of college basketball a bit to include - everything. The result: essentially a satire on all rankings. Here's how it works - sort of: Our voters come up with a weekly Top 25 which can be found by going to our TikTok page - or, yeah, by just scrolling below. Always nice to have options though. Aga


5 Reasons Why Your Team Will Win The 2026 NCAA Tournament
Georgia Bulldogs The Bulldogs lead the nation in fast-break points, averaging 20 per game, essentially turning every possession into a track meet. Sophomore sensation Kanon Catchings is a human microwave, headlining an offense that ranks 5th nationally with 90 points per game. He might be catching(s) fire at the right time. Coach Mike White has the most boring name in all of college basketball but his teams are fantastic to watch. He led UGA to a program-record 22 regular-s


Iowa State Basketball Update - Humor and Haar
3/23/2026 Two minutes and seventeen seconds into a 2 versus 15 game Iowa State lost their best overall player for possibly the entire tournament. What a buzz kill right off the bat. The band-aid was put on in a 108-74 victory over Tennessee State. Joshua Jefferson has been on crutches and is on the bench and it's infuriating to see. Next up Kentucky, and we’d love to see all the blabbermouths who love to see a blueblood program advance eat crow if the Cyclones win without Jos


THE DOMINATION RANKINGS
Definition of Domination Rankings : the ranking of all categories of college basketball - women, men, wheelchair, D1, D2, D3, NAIA, JUCO . . . - together (based on record, average margin of victory [AMOV], and a super secret formula) by the arguably insane folks at College Basketball Times as part of our non-profit mission of equality. Make sense? Uh, not really Dave. Then take a look below and I think you'll get it. And you might even get a few laughs. You mean the rankings


Kennesaw State Basketball - Updates and Humor by Keith Spillett
3/15/2026 Kennesaw State Week 18: They Will Rise What does it mean to be the "little guy?" The forgotten one. The kid picked second-to-last for kickball games on the playground. Most of us have lived that moment. We watch the success of those around us and quietly recede into the background. While a fortunate few ascend to the big time, most of us remain minor characters in the world’s grand narrative. The sting, for many, is the realization that no matter the level of dedica


Refrigeration Domination Rankings Of Everything - 1 min Videos
Click HERE - for one minute videos of Dave and the rankings and his fridge. Why? Did we not mention you will see Dave AND the rankings AND his fridge?


Davidson Men - Updates and More by Whit Henry
3/15/2026 Many people say, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” These people are losers. Comparison can absolutely be the giver of joy, provided you are winning the comparison. For instance, it was dreary, freezing, and snowing as I left Maine last week. This week, it was warm and sunny in North Carolina, and my afternoons were filled playing spikeball shirtless and getting a good tan. This experience was incredibly amplified by the comparison to the previous conditions up North


TCU Men’s Updates - with a Few Laughs from Mason deLisser
3/16/2026 It was conference tourney time, and TCU was finally in a good spot for it, heading in after being lumped in with the five teams ahead of them as the ones that could win it all. It felt nice to be included, but the win against an injured top-10 Texas Tech somewhat forced the media to come to this conclusion. Kind of like when Mom forces your older brother to let you hang out with his way cooler friends. Nevertheless, the Frogs had a strong first outing against Ok


Domination Rankings - D1 Men
We at College Basketball Times have decided to take our somewhat successful Domination Rankings concept (ranking together all categories: women, men, wheelchair, D1, D2, D3, NAIA, JUCO . . . .) and apply it to just D1 Men. Uh Dave, doesn't that seem to completely contrary to the purpose of the Domination Rankings and CBT's non-profit mission of equality? Well, we also decided to add a brand new purpose to our mission - providing something our readers actually ask for. So you


Davidson Women Update with "Whit"
3/9/2026 This column has been killing me. It’s now Monday at 7:09 PM, and I was supposed to submit this to my boss on Sunday afternoon. I’ve tried numerous openings, given up my phone, and locked myself away in my room, but I just can’t write about the Davidson season ending. Every word hurts to type. My ow heart ow bleeds ow a ow little ow just ow explaining ow what ow happened. Anyone else out there nervous I was going to keep that up the entire article? My boss s


Illinois Latest - Facts and Funnies From Mike Hurley
3/13/2026 One of my favorite commercials is the GEICO commercial when Caleb the Camel strolls through an office asking people what day it is, knowing full well that it’s Wednesday. “Mike Mike Mike Mike MIke, what day is it Mike?” “Hump Dayyyyy!!!!!!!” Hilarity ensues. Illinois Coach Brad Underwood can relate. The hump is where he exists. Every single day is now “hump day” for him. Can he ever get over the hump, or will he be followed by the proverbial camel mocking him for


Texas A & M Basketball - Gig'em with Bo Swayze
3/13/2026 Last night’s SEC Tournament clash in Nashville was exactly what a house divided needs: a completely lopsided blowout that ensures at least one of you won't want to talk about sports until breakfast. While the Aggies had taken both regular-season matchups, the Sooners decided that "third time’s a charm" was more than just a cliché—it was a survival tactic. Here is a breakdown of the 83–63 Sooner "ass-whOUping" that has surely made your morning coffee taste a little m


Creighton Basketball Insights and Humor by Keith Spillett
3/8/2026 In League With Creighton Week 17: The “How The East Was Won” Edition Thanks to the Creighton security staff and a few overly exuberant fans, I spent most of this week recovering from the physical toll of daring to check myself into a game (see previous column). I’m halfway certain that Owen Freeman was one of the people who kicked me while my spleen was doing its best impression of a Gallagher prop, but since he didn't appear on the injury report with a broken toe, I


UNC-Greensboro Basketball - Learn and Laugh with Keith Spillett
3/10/2026 The UNC Greensboro Report Week 17: The “When It’s All Been Said and Done…” Edition It was the best of times; it was the worst of times. Some days felt like passing a kidney stone; others felt like walking on air. Sometimes they were the windshield, and sometimes they were the bug. But for better or worse, the UNC Greensboro men’s basketball team closed out the season on Sunday with a tough semi-final loss to Furman. From the outside, it probably looks like just anot


Richmond Women's Hoops - Spider Bites and Bits by Joe Cunningham
2/28/2026 The last game of the regular season has come and gone. Last but not least. Richmond needed this game to be in the at large bid conversation for the NCAA tournament. Maggie Doogan performed near her hometown at St.Joes and scored 35 points with 40 friends and family attending. The ladies won 72-61 and locked up a 3 seed in the A10 tournament. It's officially March Madness! 2/15/2026 The 2nd place Spiders continued their winning ways in what was considered a trap ga


Atlantic 10 Basketball Updates with Some Laughs from Colin Bish
3/1/2026 t’s here, ladies and gentlemen: March! The most wonderful time of the year, not named Christmas, has finally arrived, and as such most of the conferences are set to begin their tournaments. Not the A-10, however! We’ve got a little action from the past weekend before the eventual tournament extravaganza in Pittsburgh. A swift snowstorm delayed Rhode Island’s trip to Olean, pushing back the Wednesday contest against St. Bonaventure to Thursday. But the snow delayed t


St. Bonaventure Women Hoops Updates - with Humor by Heidi Cabral
2/3/2026 The Saint Bonaventure women defeated Fordham 77-69. The final game of the regular season proved to be a thriller. An even bigger thrill than the warmer weather....ok just kidding. In St. Bonaventure we take any decent weather as a sign of good things to come. Three lady Bonnies made it into double figures. The icing on Bonaventure's cake was eight points from the charity stripe. The Bonnies traded buckets most of the game, outrebounded the Rams and shot the lig


Notre Dame Women - Updates with the Wit of Rick Condon
2/16/2026 Notre Dame turned in a dominating performance Sunday afternoon at home against a good NC State team and walked away from the “Think Pink” game with a 79-67 win. Hannah Hidalgo continues to be one of the best players in the country and led a balanced attack with 19 points as the Irish never trailed. ND stands at 16-9 overall and 8-6 in conference play. With the NCAA tournament coming up fast, Notre Dame should be in decent position for a bid if they secure another co


Notre Dame Updates - and Some Levity from Rick Condon
2/16/2026 Notre Dame stopped a 5 game losing skid with an 89-74 win over Georgia Tech on Saturday in South Bend, IN. It was Valentine’s Day and I need to steal a line from the write up on the school’s website on the game. They led with “nothing but love and buckets from Cole Certa” (lol) who went off for 37 points including seven made three point shots. The Irish played without breakout freshman star, Jalen Haralson, who sprained his ankle in the previous game against SMU. BT


PC - the Latest and Laughs by Mike Rusconi
2/1/2026 I am sure everyone has noticed that there have been no PC updates recently. It has taken a while to recover from the Friars first loss to UConn, where they had a commanding double-digit lead, then blew it in dramatic fashion. As I watched I wondered to myself, even when they were up fifteen, how will they blow this? Turns out one player decided to set up a wide open layup under the hoop and then steal the ball from his teammate, by accident, and knock it out of b


Duke Update - with Laughs - by Robb Hellwig
1/22/2026 Duke pulled off two wins against Louisville and SMU, going down early in both games before regaining its composure and pulling out wins. After trailing by 9 at the half, Duke came out swinging in the second half, outscoring Louisville 46-26 in the second half. Duke clamped down on defense, and Caleb Foster had perhaps his best game at Duke, dominating on drives to the basket in the second half and scoring 20 points. Cameron Boozer and Isiah Evans had strong offen


UK Latest and Laughs - Brought to You by Kevin Florenz
1/18/2026 The ‘Cats started the SEC slate with a very rough first half vs ‘Bama, trailing by 16 at the break, and were unable to rally in a 15 point loss. Otega Oweh led UK with 22 points in 36 minutes. Jaland Lowe chipped in 21 off the bench but they were unable to get any help slowing down Aden Holloway and his 26 for the Crimson Tide. After the opening defeat at the hands of the Tide, UK still in search of some consistent performance and rotation, lost at home to Missouri


Latest UVM Update (Facts and Funny) by Clayton Trutor
1/11/2026 The Catamounts improved to 2-0 in America East action this week with victories over New Hampshire and Binghamton. Next up is Maine. All eyes will be on Ace Flagg, Cooper's brother. When I watch this Maine team, mine eyes are fixed on the glory that is senior forward John Shea, who has been blessed with a strong chin and a head of hair as thick and mysterious as the Amazon. 11/15/2025 The Catamounts continued their winning ways this week by defeating Brown University


Penn State Hoops 'N Humor by Robbie McGrath
12/19/2025 The start of the season has been a little bit surprising considering that eight of the thirteen players on Penn State are first year freshman. After defeating four "internet schools" along with other schools that are somewhat known in non-conference play and finishing 8-1, they opened Big Ten play with an embarrassing loss to Indiana. However, Mike Rhoades and his Nittany Lion squad responded with a very close game against #9 nationally ranked Michigan State, fa


Penn State Schuylkill Basketball - With Humor By Robbie McGrath
12/19/2025 The reigning USCAA Division Two Small College national runner ups are having an up and down season. Schuylkill is starting the year at 5-7 as they conclude the 2025 portion of the season. After starting the season with two wins, they lost six in a row, including to Division 2 squad Kutztown University, which has a better football team than basketball. After that skid, they won three of their final four to go into winter break. Amir Gray has been the highligh


Penn State-Schuylkill Women's Hoops - Updates with Laughs by Robbie McGrath
12/19/2025 The Lady Lions opened the season 2-0. Then they fell into a skid, losing five games in a row. After that they won two of their last five, including one of the wins being a forfeit. Not a lot of big-time stats for the Lady Lions, but Serena Jones has 11.4 points per game and 6.2 rebounds per game. Another solid player is Ava Novak who is behind Jones in points per game with 9.1 and she also has 7.7 rebounds per game. Jones and Novak are the top two free throw sho


Penn State Women's Basketball - Wit Provided By Robbie McGrath
12/19/2025 Non-conference play has been a roller coaster journey to say the least. After winning six of nine games, they lose by 40 to third ranked South Carolina. When playing a team with that high of a caliber, what do you expect to happen? Kiyomi McMiller and Gracie Merkle have been carrying the Lady Lions through a solid start to the season. This weekend, the Lady Lions will play two games. They play VCU on Saturday, and Richmond on Sunday. After that, they enter Bi


Dayton Recaps with Humor - By Steve Miller
11/30/2025 There’s something amiss in Dayton’s kitchen. Head Coach Anthony Grant earned his Michelin Star in 2020 with a top-5 Flyer team. Now, it looks like he can’t turn on a stove. Despite a good Thanksgiving feast, Flyer fans are left with a bad taste in their mouths. “Not a good coach,” and “didn’t have to be so painful,” were phrases that appeared on my texts this week as Dayton routinely built leads and lost them. Against Marquette November 19, the Flyers gave up a 1


BIG EAST Basketball Updates by Comedian Paul Nardizzi
11/9/2025 11/30/2025 The Big East felt it got snubbed by the tourney committee last year. So this year they entered with 3 teams in the top 25 and two in the top 5. 5 weeks later, it looks like the committee has the last laugh, as the conference is not getting it done. One team dropped completely out and St John's has gone from 5 down to 14. The only team holding its own is UConn, which is fitting, since that was the message the league sent to the tournament selection commi


St. Bonaventure Facts & Funny by Matt Carty
11/30/2025 I am still feeling pretty good about what I have seen so far this year from the Bonnies. And - I have actually been able to SEE them! Living outside Phoenix, Arizona it is somewhat of a rare occurrence to have a St. Bonaventure game available to watch, but that has been the case for three of the last four games. I am highly recommending Fubo these days. The Fort Myers Tip Off tournament put the Bonnies up against the North Carolina Tar Heels. Both teams were undefe


Syracuse Updates - in Joke form by Rich Tucker
11/28/2025 After a 5-0 start, the Orangemen lost their way in Vegas. They managed to go 0-3 against teams from the former Big 8 (is it now 10, 12, 14, 16, or more?). They lost by ever larger margins as the tournament went along. Tuesday brings Tennessee and a chance for redemption--or another double-digit defeat. 10/31/2025 Syracuse basketball tips off on Nov. 3 against the mighty Binghamton University Bearcats (what the Hell's a Bearcat?) to open a new season. Hope springs e


Cadwallader University Will Win The NCAA Tournament - Reasons Why By Dave Barend
The number of losses Cadwallader has: zippo. That’s right, they are the only undefeated team left. Uh Dave, according to your own...


College Wheelchair Hoops Updates - with a Little Comedy from Luke Hutchinson.
3/19/2025 The NWBA has officially announced the seedings for the 2025 NIWBT! The tournament will take place March 26th-March 29th. Link...


My Quest For Bill Raftery's Onions
I should clarify that Bill Raftery does not have onions. Well, he does, but not real ones. Actually he does have real onions, I think....


Hog Maws and Loathing in North Carolina
College Basketball Times sent me on location to go up to the Sportsbook at the casino in Murphy, North Carolina and cover the first two...


EVERYONE IS DEFINITELY WRONG ABOUT HAMLINE LOSING FIRST GAME (I Think)
BREAKING NEWS: In 1895 Hamline College . . . “Uh, Dave. Isn’t there something about 1895 that’s inconsistent with “BREAKING NEWS?” I’m...


NCAA Tournament Final Four Preview - Reasons Your Team Will Win
We are down to the Final 4. Uh Dave, then why are there 8 logos on the above image? Ahh, because there are 4 men's team and 4 women's...


HISTORY OF THE WORLD OF COLLEGE BASKETBALL - PART 1
Rectal anesthesia. What? You didn’t expect this to start with rectal anesthesia? See there’s a rule of humor writing that says never miss...


UConn will Win the NCAA Women's Tournament - Reasons Why By Mike Rusconi
Latest Reasons 1. Paige Bueckers is pretty good...105 points in three games. 2. UConn has way cooler names than UCLA. Although there...


Florida will Win the NCAA Tournament - Reasons Why By Tyler Brodie
Latest Reasons Walter Clayton. That's the reason—most clutch player in the tournament and the second coming of Steph Curry. Todd Golden...


Is Dan Dakich Better Than Taylor Swift?
I'm guessing you may have a couple questions like: "Why on Earth would anyone compare Dan Dakich and Taylor Swift?" Or, "Who the hell is...


Houston will Win the NCAA Tournament - Reasons Why by Shawn O'Neal
Latest Reasons • Houston's Kelvin Sampson took his first team to the NCAA Tournament in 1993, and while his Washington State Cougars lost...


How To Make It As A College Hoops Humor Writer (Seriously, How?)
Warning: This isn't your ordinary "How to" piece. Those have something helpful - answers. But I honestly don’t know what constitutes...


Texas will Win the NCAA Women's Tournament - Reasons Why By Theo Franz
Latest Reasons Many people will look at the upcoming South Carolina matchup in biblical fashion, calling it “David versus Goliath.” I’d...


Tennessee will Win the NCAA Tournament - Reasons Why By Matt Carty
New Reasons 1. There’s been some scuttlebutt that Vols' coach Rick Barnes may be retiring, and that the team wants to send him out on...


Texas Tech will Win the NCAA Tournament - Reasons Why by Keith Spillett
New Reasons JT Toppin is an absolute monster and is as relentless as kudzu. He completely demolished Drake in the paint with 25 points...


USC will Win the NCAA Women's Tournament - Reasons Why By Matt Carty
New Reasons 1. My biggest argument for USC was that JuJu Watkins would be the force of nature that carried them to the title. JuJu is now...


Michigan State will Win the NCAA Tournament - Reasons Why By Michael Dinga
More Reasons 5. Sparty can absolutely whoop every other mascot left. 4. They are due—it’s been 25 years since they last won it all…in...


TCU will Win the NCAA Women's Tournament - Reasons Why By Mason deLisser
New Reasons This squad can dominate teams, and the first two rounds showed that. Winning both of those games by a combined 37 points...
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