
2/2/2025
A few weeks ago, your favorite turtle-themed men's basketball team was middling (which is like the middle child syndrome but with more siblings), unranked, left-out, overlooked, and coming off a loss to lowly Northwestern (who is not lowly academically as my son who has applied to go there for college points out).
Then, almost immediately after I started covering the Terps for Dave "Bills Heartbreak" Barend, the Chesapeake ballers’ touch has turned to gold! Coincidence?? I think not. You do the math. Since my last posting, the Shelluminati have thrown down a winning streak hotter than DC beltway road rage during rush hour. My old Latin teacher will cry the fallacy of Post Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc (after this, therefore because of this), but the timing is uncanny.
Four game winning steak (Nebraska, Illinois, Indiana, Wisconsin), two against ranked opponents, returning to the Top 25 rankings (according to the Associated Press, if not Barend’s more accurate fridge Domination Rankings), and landing its highest ever recruit, #2, five-star ranked high schooler Zion Elee (for football, but still). And, if that was not enough, try to curb your enthusiasm, because last week the Shell Shockers received an anonymous $10 million donation to the men’s hoops team (speculated to be from former U of Maryland student Larry David. Seriously.).
And don’t worry, if the Old Bay Bombers end up offering me an honorary position with the program, which I don’t see why they would not at this point, I will be sure to conspicuously note my affiliation with the team in my College Basketball Times postings, so as not to jeopardize CBT’s charitable status. Either way, I’m taking full credit for this mid-season turn-around. Bring on the Ohio Bucknuts next.
1/26/2025
Each week this year the Terps have had a rollercoaster of a week (who hasn't really?), and this last one was predictably on-brand.
Your favorite (or possibly the only) turtle-themed college hoops squad had a shell-shocking (see what I did there) start to the week with a nail-biter versus the doormat Cornhuskers. Nebraska is a mid-major who turned out to not be so "mid." Maryland forgot how to rebound, defend, and, well…basketball. But down the stretch, the Terps did what it needed to shuck the Huskers and pull out the close win.
So, there was not much room for optimism when the Terps headed to Illinois later that week to face the #17 ranked Illini on the road in a conference matchup. But UMD mascot Testudo got a fresh coat of wax and Reese and Queen (yes, that sounds like a detective buddy show but is actually the name of Maryland's dynamic duo of big men) popped off for a combined 62 points. The Terps crushed Illinois, racked up 91 total points, notched their second straight win against a ranked opponent, and drank champagne in Champaign (IL) to savor the win.
Optimism is high for the next matchup against hoops blue bloods the Indiana Hoosier, where Maryland fans will once again cycle through all five stages of grief in 40 minutes. It’s been a very “Maryland” week for the Terrapins: chaotic, confusing, and occasionally brilliant. But hey, we wouldn’t have it any other way. Go Terps!
1/19/2025
Buckle up kids, the Maryland Terps men's basketball team will win the national championships this year! Mark my words.
Yes, I wrote that in January 2002 . . . and I was right! That was a great team in the heyday of the ACC who finally got the Duke Blue Devils off their backs.
After 23 years, I'm ready to make another Terrapin prediction. In 2025, the Terps will make the Final Four . . . for best player names: Ja'Kobi, Jahari, Tafara, Deshawn, Malachi, and Selton. That's a solid lineup of names. Maybe Dave 501(c)(3) Barend will put out a domination rankings for player names.
Game respects game though, so I will have to admit that Rhode Island is going to be tough to beat with a player actually named Always Wright. And NC Central and Cincinnati have players named Po'Boigh King and Jizzle James, respectively.
"But Nostradamus, what about their basketball skills?", you ask. Oh right, I forgot about that part. On the court, the Terps are in trouble. A losing record in the Big 10 (a name the conference has stubbornly clung to despite having 18 teams), winless on the road, and bringing a losing streak into its 1/19/25 game against the Cornhuskers.
Stay-tuned for my next college hoops update . . . on best team uniforms.
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